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June 30, 1975

Decoys
Decoys
Episode:
15
Character:
Natty Dread
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Three modified hearses are about to set off from a remote church. Two of them are decoys.

Reaper One: "Radiator Mother, this is Reaper One. We're loaded up and ready to roll. Don't like this undercover shit, though."

Radiator Mother: "I've got no choice. No escorts to send with ya. So, watch your behinds. Creeper bastards been roaming the hillsides."

Reaper One: "Roger, Radiator Mother. We'll be careful."

Radiator Mother: "You'll be dead! Now, you all know your routes. Get moving. Stampede and the rest of the lads are expecting the cargo before nightfall."

Natty is parked on a hill. He can see the church and the three hearses in front of it.

Natty Dread: "Disco Cat, this is Natty Dread. I'm at the church. Cargo is being moved out, but they usin' three couriers. Two of 'em must be decoys."

Disco Cat: "Roger that! Better wacks all of 'em out just to be safe. Need to make sure that package ain't ever delivered! Otherwise, cowboys have the upper hand."

Natty Dread: "Don't you worry. Only delivery is gonna be my ordinance up their ass... Natty Dread out."

Natty goes after the first one.

Natty Dread: "Here kitty kitty! Oh, what's the matter? Don't cha wanna play? No matter, ain't got no choice..."

Courier: "What, you think you can take me, creeper punk?!"

Natty Dread: "Hey, now that's the spirit!"

The first hearse blows up. Natty goes after the second one.

Reaper One: "Radiator Mother, this is Reaper One. Got a creeper on me. Must be hip to the gig."

Radiator Mother: "Keep moving! Do your best to evade the bastard."

But he doesn't get far.

Reaper One: "Aaaaahhhhh!"

Natty Dread: "Oh, that's gotta hurt... At least, I hope it did. Like I always say, two dead cowboys is better than one. Although one ain't bad..."

Soon, the third hearse with the package is also destroyed.

Natty Dread: "Disco Cat, this is Natty Dread. You copy?"

Disco Cat: "Go ahead, Dread. I copy ya."

Natty Dread: "The cargo's toast, and so are the couriers. A real productive day. Real fun too. And that's what's important after all..."

Disco Cat: "Roger, brother. Gonna be a sweet little set back for those cowboy suckers..."

Natty Dread: "You're right about that. See you back at the Den. Natty Dread out..."

Other quotes[]

  • A hearse reaches its destination.

Taurus: "Radiator Mother, come back. This is Stampede. Looks like the cargo's arrived. Phase one complete."

Radiator Mother: "Excellent! Creepers are going to be in for a rude awakening now."

Taurus: "Roger that, Mother. Now, prep for phase two. We need those cars ready to go as soon as possible. Over and out."

Natty Dread: "Well, shit."

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